I love birthdays...

I love birthdays....especially mine :P

Really pampered this year. So many things happened, and so many blessings. Just a little lazy to type all of them here. Oh well.....

I will do it SOON!

Procrastination in posting blogpost seem to be a very common thing to me now :S
oopps~

This is YOUR LIFE

"This Is Your Life"

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken
Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes
This is your life and today is all you've got now
Yeah, and today is all you'll ever have
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life are you who you want to be?
This is your life are you who you want to be?

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

And you had everything to lose 

As I was driving home, I had the longest flashback ever (with the rain and the jam).

It was long ago since I heard this song. But it spoke to me so much. 

I was brought back to the first time when I received Christ, on how I really became so passionate in preaching the gospel, in showing love, in becoming better. my lifestyle was exciting every single day. In doing so many things. Deep inside, I have a sense that I CAN do great things for God. And at that time  it doesn't matter what my circumstances were. I didn't care! I couldn't care less. I just want to love God, worship Him and do everything I could for Him, I found something to live excitedly for every single day. Not one day was boring.

As we grew older...this sense of passion seem to vanish somewhere. We often think of the "yesterdays" of life...the "good old days" so-called. When times were simpler, less worries, less responsibilities. Now, it is harder to cope...so lets be more lenient on ourselves. You are not young anymore, why push yourself to the limit? Working hours is already 8 hours! You need rest....Ah...but "Yesterday" you did it all...you did well...wow, how you wish you were in yester years, where times were not so busy, and you can do more things...

But hello, the yesterdays are wrinkle the forehead. it is consumed by time, it is dead and over, and indeed...it is a promise broken.

We always tell ourselves...when I am older, when I have more freedom, I have more money...this is the person I want to be. I want to make a difference. I want to brave to speak for the broken, for the underprivileged, I want to shower love, I want to go to Africa, I want to go to the homeless children, the abused....its all but a promise broken.

Today, as we reflect on our lives. Is it the ONE that we expect to live, the ONE we have dreamed it would be? FULL of fire, FULL of passion? When the world was younger, when we were younger, when nothing else matters but our passion, our dreams, when we were fearless and have nothing to lose. Everything to risk. We are just so consumed by our passion. Where is it now?

"We are busy now and have more responsibilities"....some would say

Now that we are grown up, all these are like distant away. Practicality comes first, passion comes later. Earning more, do not take risk, stay safe, what ifs of being rejected, or things will never turn out the way we hoped it would be and we will have to face embarrassments, insults, circumstances, shame....etc etc

ENOUGH! I had everything to lose once. I should have even more now. Today, as much as it is important to be wise, to be practical, I want to live a life that has everything to lose....without regrets, without what ifs....Live everyday, like it is your LAST

Step one: Let the LOVE REVOLUTION begin!

Just passed my 24th birthday...time to rekindle the "old flame"...the passion of the to-do list I once had. Let's go dig it out (wait for my next blog). Shall not wait till I am 30, and when I have 5 kids to juggle, with house chores, a husband and a job. Hahaha! Funny scene.

What about you? Are you afraid to revisit that dream or that passion buried deep down within? To be a singer? a writer? "too old" perhaps you feel?

This is your life. Are you who you gonna be? 

TODAY IS ALL YOU HAVE GOT NOW!!!

Sometimes.....

Sometimes, when I am tired, and I have a lot of things to manage and do...
To complete within a day, and I ALREADY need much more strength and focus and energy than usual (because I am tired), I'd appreciate some peace and quiet (This is especially NECESSARY when I am very tired).


There are times for us to finish up our tasks, there are times to hang around and talk. I don't mind talking, but to me, the setting, the place, the TIME is very important. I need to switch mode. I cannot be at TWO modes at once. I feel very divided. Unless if I am very PEK CHEK and I need an output to rant my feelings. Other than that, I really cannot "layan" talks about many many others. You can talk to me about yourself. But not others.


I realize recently, I kinda feel my privacy invaded when people keep looking for me to just talk. Talk about others, talk about things that will not change or solve anything. Just ranting, gossips, empty talks. What joy does it gives? I don't find it fruitful. Maybe it is an output, of stress release for that person. Sigh...I should be more gracious. But I feel, perhaps, at a time when we are all done with our work, we can talk about it? A better time, when I am more ready to listen?


Have I become an INTROVERT gradually? *gasp*....sign of old age. hahahaha! Hmm....perhaps I am just too tired with the deprived sleep recently. Not very used to it after OFF college life. Easily frust without full 6 hours sleep. LOL. Sigh...alright, I need to keep giving love. Be a good listener. Be patient.


Ultimately....I need to sleep FULL SIX HOURS! I don't care whether it is an aging matter or what. But, without that, anything can drive you up the wall! Like seriously! Lol.

Jialat.