Heartfelt moment...

Today, as I witnessed the baptism of one of my member, Amy....I felt really touched.

Looking at the lives dipping into the water, rising up again, people cheering....non-believers may not understand. Even Christians, sometimes do not understand what it means. Part of a Christian process some would say.

But I have all along knew that baptism is something really significant. So much so, that even non-Christians understand that you are never really a Christian unless you get water baptized. my mom always thinks that way. That is the reason why, she often think that so long as I am not baptized, I am still not really a Christian and can "slide back" to my old religion.

Today as I went and looked at those beautiful people immerse and rise again, tears begin to well up in my eyes. Today so many people have decided that they will DECLARE their faith and love for God. And that from today onwards, they will be identified with Christ. Living not a life of their old. The old is dead (dip into the water), the resurrected is a new life (up from the water again).


I want to be FULLY identified with Christ. And I know the moment I decide that, I can no longer turn back, and each and every action I take I represent Christ. Asked my member how she felt after being baptized, she replied "I feel really really really good". Indeed, it is not just an activity. Something spiritual does happen when one is baptized.

I am anticipating mine. A FULL life as disciple of Christ. I will be joining the next baptism with one of my very close friend. Even though we know this decision will lead to many possible consequences, but we know, it will be worth it. There is a significance we anticipate to be part of. There will be a difference.

Can't wait...=)

I love birthdays...

I love birthdays....especially mine :P

Really pampered this year. So many things happened, and so many blessings. Just a little lazy to type all of them here. Oh well.....

I will do it SOON!

Procrastination in posting blogpost seem to be a very common thing to me now :S
oopps~

This is YOUR LIFE

"This Is Your Life"

Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken
Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes
This is your life and today is all you've got now
Yeah, and today is all you'll ever have
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Yesterday is a kid in the corner
Yesterday is dead and over

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed that it would be?
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes
Don't close your eyes

This is your life are you who you want to be?
This is your life are you who you want to be?

This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, are you who you want to be?
This is your life, is it everything you dreamed it would be
When the world was younger and you had everything to lose

And you had everything to lose 

As I was driving home, I had the longest flashback ever (with the rain and the jam).

It was long ago since I heard this song. But it spoke to me so much. 

I was brought back to the first time when I received Christ, on how I really became so passionate in preaching the gospel, in showing love, in becoming better. my lifestyle was exciting every single day. In doing so many things. Deep inside, I have a sense that I CAN do great things for God. And at that time  it doesn't matter what my circumstances were. I didn't care! I couldn't care less. I just want to love God, worship Him and do everything I could for Him, I found something to live excitedly for every single day. Not one day was boring.

As we grew older...this sense of passion seem to vanish somewhere. We often think of the "yesterdays" of life...the "good old days" so-called. When times were simpler, less worries, less responsibilities. Now, it is harder to cope...so lets be more lenient on ourselves. You are not young anymore, why push yourself to the limit? Working hours is already 8 hours! You need rest....Ah...but "Yesterday" you did it all...you did well...wow, how you wish you were in yester years, where times were not so busy, and you can do more things...

But hello, the yesterdays are wrinkle the forehead. it is consumed by time, it is dead and over, and indeed...it is a promise broken.

We always tell ourselves...when I am older, when I have more freedom, I have more money...this is the person I want to be. I want to make a difference. I want to brave to speak for the broken, for the underprivileged, I want to shower love, I want to go to Africa, I want to go to the homeless children, the abused....its all but a promise broken.

Today, as we reflect on our lives. Is it the ONE that we expect to live, the ONE we have dreamed it would be? FULL of fire, FULL of passion? When the world was younger, when we were younger, when nothing else matters but our passion, our dreams, when we were fearless and have nothing to lose. Everything to risk. We are just so consumed by our passion. Where is it now?

"We are busy now and have more responsibilities"....some would say

Now that we are grown up, all these are like distant away. Practicality comes first, passion comes later. Earning more, do not take risk, stay safe, what ifs of being rejected, or things will never turn out the way we hoped it would be and we will have to face embarrassments, insults, circumstances, shame....etc etc

ENOUGH! I had everything to lose once. I should have even more now. Today, as much as it is important to be wise, to be practical, I want to live a life that has everything to lose....without regrets, without what ifs....Live everyday, like it is your LAST

Step one: Let the LOVE REVOLUTION begin!

Just passed my 24th birthday...time to rekindle the "old flame"...the passion of the to-do list I once had. Let's go dig it out (wait for my next blog). Shall not wait till I am 30, and when I have 5 kids to juggle, with house chores, a husband and a job. Hahaha! Funny scene.

What about you? Are you afraid to revisit that dream or that passion buried deep down within? To be a singer? a writer? "too old" perhaps you feel?

This is your life. Are you who you gonna be? 

TODAY IS ALL YOU HAVE GOT NOW!!!

Sometimes.....

Sometimes, when I am tired, and I have a lot of things to manage and do...
To complete within a day, and I ALREADY need much more strength and focus and energy than usual (because I am tired), I'd appreciate some peace and quiet (This is especially NECESSARY when I am very tired).


There are times for us to finish up our tasks, there are times to hang around and talk. I don't mind talking, but to me, the setting, the place, the TIME is very important. I need to switch mode. I cannot be at TWO modes at once. I feel very divided. Unless if I am very PEK CHEK and I need an output to rant my feelings. Other than that, I really cannot "layan" talks about many many others. You can talk to me about yourself. But not others.


I realize recently, I kinda feel my privacy invaded when people keep looking for me to just talk. Talk about others, talk about things that will not change or solve anything. Just ranting, gossips, empty talks. What joy does it gives? I don't find it fruitful. Maybe it is an output, of stress release for that person. Sigh...I should be more gracious. But I feel, perhaps, at a time when we are all done with our work, we can talk about it? A better time, when I am more ready to listen?


Have I become an INTROVERT gradually? *gasp*....sign of old age. hahahaha! Hmm....perhaps I am just too tired with the deprived sleep recently. Not very used to it after OFF college life. Easily frust without full 6 hours sleep. LOL. Sigh...alright, I need to keep giving love. Be a good listener. Be patient.


Ultimately....I need to sleep FULL SIX HOURS! I don't care whether it is an aging matter or what. But, without that, anything can drive you up the wall! Like seriously! Lol.

Jialat.

I can't Believe

Can't believe I am living at such an exciting times like these.

Can't believe I am part of such a GREAT vision. Doesn't matter what is going on with life, there is always a greater that is worth living for and going on for.

So many things have happened. Wish I had the time to blog all of them. Perhaps after work today. :)


This is it....! The greater cause the greater call. Here I am. Send me.

Random Thoughts

Sometimes I hope I can get married to a rich guy SOON!!

Haha....why you ask?

Just so that I do not need to work already (financially stable) and do what I am really passionate about FULL TIME. Redeem the broken lives, in the dark alleys, and the back streets.

But then again....it is important to SHINE in the marketplace. Just a random post, random thought. haha. :) Oh well, if it is His will, we'll know! God is good. Renewed passion. New season.

New day, new dawn.

Precious...

I'm in a season whereby there are many crossroads, many decisions, sacrifices.

The question that constantly haunt my mind: How long more do I have before time runs out? (Lol...sounds like I am dying, aye?) ...Am I making a full use of it? What am I called to do? What can I do to build on my passion, to fulfill the destiny and the purposes I have been called to? I want to give my best in this life to do all it takes to fulfill the call of life.

Jesus often answer: Great! But the question here is, are you willing to lay down your precious, for the course of My call?

Last Sunday was really faith-stretching for me, when I decide to give my precious to God. Tears just streamed non-stop down my cheek, as I hand over what I have considered to be truly all I have had for a future I am looking forward to the comng year.

As I gave it away.....there's a strong pull in my heart. Haha. Because this is really very precious! I feel the pain in giving it....and  as I kept praying and casting my trust toward God, God's peace came upon me....and a certain realization came into my mind.

In life, treasure and precious could be anything. Precious doesn't mean just the material possesions, nor does it only come in monetary form. Treasure could be anything. Anything that is dear to your heart. Sometimes we are willing to sacrifice certain areas of our lives for God to move. Sometimes, we refuse God to touch some other areas of our lives.

"God this I can give. No, that I can't...not that...Oh, this, You can take it...."

Aren't we just so contradicting sometimes? We often tell God...we will trust Him with every step we take. But along the way, we begin grabbing things and insist, these are the areas we expect a certain result so much so that we refuse God to touch that part in fear of another result. The common struggle between the human flesh and the human spirit. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.

I have been meditating on Gal 2:20-21. A verse that encourages us to be selfless. Selfless is not just about putting others first. When life does not sail the direction you expect it to be, laying down all the struggles in your mind, just trusting God, and His sovereignity. That is being SELFLESS.

Trusting God cannot be just a saying. Confessing with your mouth have to couple with believing it with your heart. If you do not believe, whatever confessed is void. Faith is the currency where exchange of heavenly fruits begin to occur.

This year, the theme of my life, is to: DIE to self. It doesn't matter what I feel, or what I want, or what I expect. I want to place all my worries, my circumstances, my doubts on the altar....and trust Him each and every step. No matter how frustrated, how unwilling, I will attempt to do what He wants me to do. Ain't it true, that dying to self, simply means dying to the precious in one's life? SELF talks about what is IMPORTANT and PRECIOUS to me is the most important. Selfless talks about what is important and precious to me is secondary.

Not easy. Can we truly DIE to the preciouses in all aspect of our lives....and give it all to Him? I will definitely attempt my best.

Truly, the only way to be selfless, is when we give away our precious, fixed our eyes on Jesus, the source of strength and breakthroughs in life.

Let's lay down our precious. Take up the cross and follow Jesus. One step at a time.